The day I first found out I was pregnant. And the way I broke the news.

The day I first found out I was pregnant.

We had been married less than a month. 

We tackled a massive renovation in my attic apartment.

I did my part of late night sanding, painting, base boards..

You name it, I did it. But Sept 2nd, I felt like I got a virus or something.

I felt sick.  So I made a doctors appt and took a pregnancy test... FOR FUN.

It was positive.

I told Jack. He smiled and said: "Already!?"

Before we got married we talked about when we would start our family and it seemed like the Lord was prompting both of us not to wait... so there was the verdict.

When I got to the doctor, I was informed that there was no medicine to cure this virus I had

because I was indeed pregnant.

3 weeks pregnant.

We broke the news by video tapping our first ultra sound.

We notified all of our siblings, parents first.

Then we sent the message viral.

Overloaded

Do you think their is a spiritual connection between being pregnant and being emotional.

To be given an extra added measure of overload... Overload of Love...

Its debilitating sometimes right?

Everything makes you cry. But you are never said.

The overload of emotions is something I've wanted so long to fill.

You can't stop, yet, you can't control.

What can you do about it?

Embrace it. Be grateful for it.

The the feelings of overloaded emotions wash over you.

Focus on the peace of the baby inside of you.

I feel the tiny movements inside of me,

and this is not something I could produce myself.

This is left me wanting to know about whats on the other side of that veil.

For the overloaded feeling I can only imagine is the veil not being lifted but maybe just bumped into.

Like the baby inside, bumping into your tummy, just to let you know, he is there.

Or she.

Can I stay like this forever?

Like after labor and delivery?

To be more involved with the needs of someone other than me.

To have a duality to protecting and caring for my temple.

I have felt Heavenly Father's love more- through this little piece of Jack and I growing inside of me.

Overloaded and In Love.

28 Weeks

28 Weeks.

I've gained 12.3 lbs.

I passed my glucola test after the second time..

here was the first experience:

How to fail your Oral Glucose test, before you even take it:

Wake up feeling great- Drink the 10 ounces, let it remind you of Gatorade..

You decide to walk to your appt. You began a slight job- You only have a half a block to go- you feel great 26 weeks pregnant- then you get a whiff of the McDonalds across the street and barf up all 10 ounces. 

No big deal- You've thrown up 346 times in the last 26 weeks.... Except you get to the doctors and they look at you weird when you tell them you jogged over to take your test and you threw up-

They send you away for another day.

Expect this passage to be in the book I write called: WHAT NEVER EVER TO EXPECT WHEN YOURE PREGNANT. ha.

GOOD MORNING MONDAY!

_________________________

No complaints. I'm tired and happy. 

A mothers womb

Image credit: unknown- Please someone direct us to the artist.

Twin babies were in a mother’s womb. One asked: “Do you think there's life after delivery?”

The other baby answered, “Why, yes, of course. There has got to be something after delivery. Perhaps we are here to prepare ourselves for what we will be later.”

“Nonsense” said the first. “There is no life after delivery. What kind of life would that be?”

The second replied, “I don’t know, but there will be more light than here. Maybe we will walk with our legs and eat from our mouths. Maybe we will have other senses that we cannot comprehend right now.”

The first snorted, “That is absurd. Walking is impossible. And eating with our mouths? Ridiculous! The umbilical cord supplies nutrition and everything we need. And the umbilical cord is so short that life after delivery is illogical.”

The second insisted, “Well I think there is something and maybe it’s different than it is here. Maybe we won’t need this cord anymore.”

The first replied, “That's stupid. If there is life, then why has no one ever come back from there? Delivery is the end of life, and in the after-delivery there is nothing but darkness and silence and oblivion. It takes us nowhere.”

“Well, I don’t know,” answered the second, “but certainly we will meet Mother and she will take care of us.”

The first laughed, “Mother? You actually believe in Mother? That’s moronic. If Mother exists then where is She now?”

The second replied, “She is all around us. We are surrounded by Her. We are of Her. It is in Her that we live. Without Her our world would not and could not exist.”

Said the first: “Well I don’t see Her, so it is only logical that She doesn’t exist.”

To which the second responded, “Sometimes, when it's quiet and I focus and really listen, I can perceive Her presence, and I can hear Her loving voice singing over us from above.”

--- written in 2012 by Czech psychiatrist Jirina Prekop MD, who authored Erstgeborene and has co-authored Auf Schatzsuche bei unseren Kindern.